to clarify, the only person’s opinion of you you should truly care about is your own, it is valuable to consider others, but you decide for yourself and only you.
As a man I can confirm that my opinions don’t mean shit
As a girl I can confirm that my opinions also don’t mean shit
I only have the opinions the girls tell me to have, which 99% of the time is “naps are good.”
at this point I have no brain, just eep :x
this is a good opinion, but only because it aligns with my own of course
Thinking about men’s opinions about me: I don’t care B)
Me when one (1) man insults me: ;-;
Why onli mens opinions?..
Bigoted men often comment on women’s appearance.
“Too much makeup.” “Your skirt is too short.” “You should smile more.”
It goes without saying that the women they’re judging weren’t asking for their opinions.
soooo it’s bigoted men who we shouldn’t pay attention to. but that’s like --.-_,.-nothing new >~<
also i’ve never heard peeps say that ever before… maybe cuz im not from the freedom country…
every time i see one of the posts going "This guy told that woman ‘i think u would look nicer without makeup’ " and he’s being portraid negatively, i always thought
but like… what if he like . . .-… idk, what if he means it genuinely, in a non-destructive, non-controlling way?.. like “Hey, we’ve known each other for some time now, and … idk if u think so too, but i think that lipgloss might be just a bit too… aggressive? If u like it it’s totally fine, im very happy if that is the case. I just wanted to share my opinion on this, since u also tell me sometime that my tie looks off or stuff like that”.
Also, i feel it’s weird this is being specifically targeted at men. This might just be me having a weird internal fight of “Men are awful cuz capitalism and selfish” and “Men can be so super nice, let’s not assume the worst all the time”, idk…
If another women were to tell some woman that some makeup might be just a lil too much, would that be much better? If so, i feel that is rather unfair… ;(
The problem is that men generally don’t understand that even “no makeup” looks still feature makeup. I’d also be kinda annoyed if a woman commented negatively on my appearance without solicitation. Like, maybe I want my makeup to be aggressive, stfu!
The amount of times I see people praising a “no-makeup” look when the person has on eyeliner and mascara is way too often. Like have you never seen your own face before?
tbf, I have really lush lashes naturally (っ˘ڡ˘ς)
My favorite ones are the “no makeup/filters” photos where the skin tone is perfectly even across the face which is of course impossible without foundation.
I’m not from the eagle country either (though not in a better place) and by being quite close with my femme relatives I’ve seen this shit happen on many occasions.
It’s almost never polite, it’s never “well I think that would be better”. Oftentimes the “advice” is done with an insult, e.g. by comparing a woman to a prostitute.
Usually they’re just strangers who has no business telling her how she should dress. And yes, if it was a woman saying this it would still be equally bad. But it’s rarely a woman, 99% of the time it’s a man.
Yeah, the premise that all men must be ignored is bad but it’s the emotional response that often develops after yet another such an idiot opens his mouth.
not only men, nobody’s opinion of you means anything unless you want it to. that being said, I find that it’s most often men who offer unhelpful, or even offensive advice unsolicited. if a man happens to get offended by my unsolicited opinion by seeing this then all I have to say is ~~ <3 ~~ :3c
I jus… I rlli want to believe that that many manly peeps aren’t evil.
I wana believe that this is just me projecting everything bad [capitalist, selfish, unhelpful, not empathetic, unreasonable, loud, aggressive, angry, insults more] onto something, and not axtual reality. Like - it can’t be that clear cut…
Evil is a religious word, they likely aren’t inherently irredeemable but they have probably been conditioned to have certain beliefs about what they should and are allowed to say/think/do which they need to unlearn in order to not be harmful to others.
To people who give unsolitcited opinions, not to any of the commenters here:
Sings If we haven’t asked for your opinion then we don’t want to know it. If we haven’t asked for your opinion then we don’t want to know it. If we haven’t asked for your opinion then we don’t want to know it. So fuck you!
That an opinion is stated by an entity does not make the opinion valid by itself.
It is possible that an entity can state a valid opinion.
Thus opinions should be evaluated by their reasoning and not by the entity formulating it.
Sorry but I feel like yapping about this so…
I’d say you are trying to reason against a factual point made in the post. For that your fist step is to remove as much (social) context from the hypothetical as possible by referring to an abstract entity and opinion. And to be honest, your factual reasoning is impeccably, logically true. But are you sure anyone was having this debate with you in the first place? Not to discredit you, but your three step argument here is as succinct as it is obvious (at least to me). I disagree not with your argument, but your choice to engage with the original statement as a factual debate point. There’s a chance the OP had intended to communicate a very different message than all men’s opinions on oneself being always irrelevant. Removing context to only engage with the factual dimension of their statement deprives you of a chance to learn more about the OPs and the communities intentions and values. Much like past public conversations (remember gamer gate, or more recently the hypothetical of the bear vs man) I personally believe the point of hyperbolic feminist statements is not for you to debate them, or push back against them, but to understand them. After all, saying essentially “not all men” is factually true and very easy, but doesn’t actually help anyone/improve anything. I wonder what kind of social interactions would lead to OP posting this (and this community identifying with it)? Perhaps a systemic patriarchy could put unjust pressure on a person to push them into a very understandably unnuanced response to such mistreatment. Either way I gain much more insight by empathizing with the post. Arguing factually would feel like punching ghosts while wasting energy that could be used to improve society a little.
I know that for me anyway, I read similar opinions when I was a young man and felt unfairly discriminated. But to be honest, looking back, I was never entitled to women who had suffered much worse under the patriarchy expertly lecturing me in my relative privilege (and all that without hurting my feelings). Like sure, me feeling unfairly judged for my gender whenever I misunderstood such a post as an attack on me personally was unfair too, but simply not the point, nor a priority here. If I could travel back in time to give some advice and emotional support to the young me, I’d rather find someone else who needs it way more to give it to. Nowadays I like to consider words not just for what they communicate, but also for what they do. And if this post helped someone vent who really needed it and gave a relatable outlet to this community than all I have to do is recognize it for the mutual support it is. I’m writing this because hearing it earlier would have saved me much frustration fighting imaginary misandrist feminists and because I’m also still just figuring much of this out myself.
It is unlikely that an entity’s unsolicited opinion of me is warranted or deserves my evaluation
But not impossible.
I don’t even need to consider their opinion because it was unwarranted. Expecting women to consider every unwanted piece of advice is cruel because too many of them are worthless.
Unless the negative statement is about how another person creates actual problems for you, don’t give it. As a rule, any opinions that don’t qualify should be ignored.
I expect every person to consider every other persons opinion. Well, not really expecting, but I think it would make life better for everybody.
And I think you are right that it would be cruel to expect that just from women.
But that is not a one-way-street. People who give an opinion have the duty to give an opinion that is helpful and comes from a good place and not just bullying.
I expect every person to consider every other persons opinion. Well, not really expecting, but I think it would make life better for everybody.
You would not do well against fascists. It’s not just them though, as anyone can abuse this expectation. People can easily voice unreasonable opinions just to fuck with others and/or waste their time. Don’t pay such voices any mind. Not every voice can be taken in good faith.
On top of that, people rarely want the opinions of others, as they’re often fully aware of what people point out. It just makes them feel ashamed when someone points out something they’re already aware of. When you get the urge to voice your opinion of others, think about why giving it matters to you. Do not “look out for” other people, as it feels patronizing when you try to claim you know what’s best for them. If it isn’t something that affects you, do not say it.
