• Feydaikin@beehaw.org
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      3 months ago

      If you’re messed up enough, there’s a chance the state has payed for them. On the other hand, at that point there’s probably also a very specific reason for being single.

    • Kenny2999@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      I recommend a glottal stimulation of air paticles to cause positive vibrations of a membrane inside the receivers skull cavity resulting in consentual intra-species discourse. Chicks dig that shit.

    • Ricky Rigatoni
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      3 months ago

      How about one for people whose self esteem is anready abysmal and won’t be able to handle the horrors normal dating apps inflict on people.

    • Maven (famous)@lemmy.zip
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      3 months ago

      There was an open source dating app for a bit. It still technically exists but theres no advertising for it and therefore nobody uses it so all of the accounts are dead including mine

  • hazel@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 months ago

    I hope this happens so I can hop on the fake ex market early. I’ll insert you into my fictional dating history at a rate of $50 per month that we were supposedly together.

  • Psythik@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Where the hell am I going to find two exes? I’m almost 40 and still with my first girlfriend.

  • FurryMemesAccount@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    3 months ago

    Look into the match group. All their dating apps (and they own almost all of them) are designed to only make pairings that almost work but have one fatal incompatibility so both users come back and use the app again.

    It’s evil. Never use them. They own at least:

    Archer
    Asian People Meet
    Babyboomer People Meet
    BB People Meet
    Black Christian People Meet
    Black People Meet
    Black Professional People Meet
    BLK
    Catholic People Meet
    Chinese People Meet
    Chispa
    Delightful
    Democratic People Meet
    Divorced People Meet
    Genxpeoplemeet
    Hinge
    Indiamatch
    Interracial People Meet
    Italian People Meet
    J People Meet
    Latino People Meet
    Ldsplanet
    Little People Meet
    Loveandseek
    Marriage Minded People Meet
    Match.com
    Match Japan
    OkCupid
    Ourtime
    People Meet
    Pet People Meet
    Republican People Meet
    Seniorblack People Meet
    Single People Meet
    Stir
    The League
    Tinder
    Upward
    Veggiepeoplemeet
    Yuzu
    
      • FurryMemesAccount@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        3 months ago

        It’s obviously not the sort of thing you’d find on the internet…

        I personally know one of the employees.

        Make of that what you will, but the terrible state of the dating scene should hopefully steer you in my direction.

      • FurryMemesAccount@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        3 months ago

        I successfully used discord, telegram and IRL events, oftentimes organized through these platforms.

        Find some community for a hobby you’re into and be sociable.

        Or use whatever other platform the communities you’re into uses and don’t be a creep. On the plus side, you’ll have some common pastime to nerd about together~

  • drath@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    I can easily get both. Yet I know I am a deeply broken person and probably the last person you should date.

  • Lemminary@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    That’s a tough one, because my last relationships were with a narcissist, an abusive manipulator, a gold digger, and someone who made terrible assumptions about my situation out of prejudice. And my last therapist wanted to get paid without putting in much work.

    Isn’t dating fun? It’s like a Kinder egg with shit inside every time.

  • otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    3 months ago

    It used to be friends/acquaintances that’d vouch for you, but ever since they paywalled that shit… 🤷🏼‍♂️