I recently made a new account on lemmy.blahaj.zone, because Iāve been harassed and doxxed on my old account and I wanted a fresh start with a more lighthearted online identity that I could be more open about my gender identity on. Iād heard blahaj zone was good for trans people, so I made my account there. And yeah, autism@lemmy.world removed my post discussing neuronormativism from a queer perspective, but I hoped maybe āthe trans instanceā would be friendlier to trans people.
A couple days after making my account, I saw someone on Blahaj engaging in the tired old cliche of āI hate politics, thereās no politics on my social media and I want to keep it that way!ā Well weāve all heard the joke that the two races are white and political, the two genders are male and political, and the two sexualities are straight and political. Hatred of politics is a transphobic, sexist, and racist trope. And having sufferred harassment and abuse from people inside the queer community who āhated politicsā and saw trans or nonbinary or xenogender identities as political, I knew this kind of speech was going to make bigots feel comfortable saying they also hate politics, and they think us trans people are it.
So, I responded to the transphobia. I started out by attempting to educate them on what politics actually means. But I was interrupted by the Blahaj admin Ada, who told me that politics is āanything I disagree withā, and that indeed politics isnāt welcome on Blahaj. This language was deeply triggering of my past issues dealing with abuse, and I knew from past experience this sort of thing is said by people who are getting ready to say some enbyphobic or racist hate speech. It is especially common for white queer people to talk this way to BIPOC queer people. I tried to reason with Ada, explained the history of the cliche, the trauma itās caused many trans people, and the consequences this kind of speech will have on the community here, making us all less safe.
Ada wasnāt having it. She minimised my concerns by reducing them to my personal trauma while ignoring my wider concerns for othersā safety, and weaponised my PTSD to paint my opinions as invalid because I am mentally ill. She said she owns Blahaj, and she gets to do whatever she wants with it, and nobody is allowed to express a differing opinion, even one that protects trans people, because thatās politics. At the time I thought her concern was me speaking directly to transphobes and making them feel uncomfortable by calling out their actions, so I said Iād just report it instead, and she banned my account.
This behaviour protects transphobes, WILL lead to trans and BIPOC people being harassed on this instance, attacks and gaslights victims of trauma (my concerns canāt be valid because I have a mental illness), and forces out any trans person with a commitment to safety for the community.
The thread where all this happened: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2143969
EDIT: The person who originally posted the transphobic views on politics is now misgendering me and calling me a āguyā despite me being very openly nonbinary: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/comment/2319669. And I didnāt call them autistic at any point.
Saying this as somebody just reading the post, I donāt know the whole context.
Being somebody who is BIPOC, youāre not doing us much of a favor either by having an outrage across multiple corners of the fediverse. Take a breather. Seriously, zoom out and just consider what you are writing right now.
ā¦what if I just donāt like seeing news that only makes me feel angry or bad on my feed. People have different things they want to participate in and see. Just because you like it to discuss it doesnāt mean you should jump to accusations when someone doesnāt want to. Its a sensitive topic to begin with. I just come here to see tech, cars, and art.
This comes off very pretentious. Just let this one go bro.
Look, I donāt know whatās going on with this blahaj placeās moderation or whatever and its not my business. Just based on what I see here, you may want to take a good proof read at what you are saying and spreading around before you lead yourself somewhere that you regret. If you donāt like this blahaj serverās rules or anything, just leave. Its just the internet. You might find somewhere better suited for you if you just move your account to another instance. If you want to voice concerns, spreading posts like these across multiple communities isnāt the way to do it.
Yes, but, but ā¦
āWhat do you want me to do? LEAVE? Then theyāll keep being wrong!ā
I really appreciate your advice
Thatās not the meaning of the word politics. Politics means group decision making. Every group is constantly making decisions, like āWhere should we eat? Did we enjoy that movie? Isnāt this animal cute? How are we going to deliver the clientās product in two weeks?ā Those are politics, and they are also the bread and butter of human socialisation. This other thing youāre talking about, bad news, thatās not what politics is. Sure, bad news is political, but thatās because everything is political.
The belief that bad news and politics are the same thing has been used to justify transphobia, sexism, and racism. Because the belief leads people to hate politics, and that means any bad actor can (correctly) call something they donāt like political and stoke hatred. Trans people are political because everything is political. There will always be a way to paint trans people as political because itās true. So if trans people are political and most people hate politics, then all a bad actor has to do in order to justify hatred of trans people is call us political while being dishonest about what politics means.
Thatās why dishonesty and mistruth around the definition of politics causes transphobia. Thatās why hating politics is transphobic.
This is the definition of politics (Merriam-Webster).
Youāre taking it way out of context. If I tell somebody we should go for a walk its not anything beyond just socializing. Please stop jumping to conclusions.
Iāll just leave it there. Not really here to go back and forth.
Your link says politics is āthe total complex of relations between people living in societyā. That includes asking somebody to go for a walk.
I feel you missed a chance to get a less aggressive perspective on all of this.
The other person told you they ājust come here to see tech, cars, and art.ā. Probably hinting at a casual experience, with little to no opinionated or controversial topics. Maybe they have a mental health too, maybe they have a super political day job, or whatever. There are many reasons for people to seek another experience on Lemmy than you do. This does not necessarily imply they are your political enemies and need a lesson from you.
While in a specific way it is true that everything is politics, this does not mean it is okay to make everything about politics. You cannot connect a persons desire to have Lemmy without politics to justifications about transphobia, sexism, and racism. Thatās crossing several lines.
Have you looked into non-violent communication?