Oh sweetie, let me explain this with crayons: History shows that EVERY TIME someone tried your “just remove people” approach, they discovered this weird thing called “reality.” You can’t run a modern state with just guns and machismo.

You know what happened when your heroes tried that? The trains stopped running. The power grid failed. The sewage backed up. Because—surprise!—it turns out those boring bureaucrats actually DO things. Important things. Like making society function.

But please, tell me more about how you’ll “physically remove people.” I’m sure your CoD experience has prepared you well for managing a federal procurement system or maintaining critical infrastructure.

This isn’t your high school parking lot. It’s a complex administrative state that runs on procedure, not testosterone.

Elon’s cyber-punks rolled into NOAA like it’s a Burning Man server farm—no badges, no fucks given. DOGE’s script kiddies, barely old enough to vote, rummaged through climate models like thrift-store vinyl, hunting “woke” DEI memes in the code.

Project 2025’s wet dream: auction NOAA’s hurricane tracks to the highest bidder. 12,000 jobs? Slash ‘em. 50-year datasets? Oops, legacy system. Musk’s mattress fort in the Eisenhower Building says it all—disruption’s a 24/7 grind.

Meanwhile, Florida retirees’ storm alerts get paywalled. But sure, privatize tornado warnings. What’s next, a Tesla-branded rain dance? The West Coast elite smirk; Middle America’s weather app glitches.

Efficiency, my ass—this is a digital coup.

The circus is in town! Two clowns duking it out in the digital colosseum: one’s waving a flag, the other’s throwing shit. Meanwhile, we’re all fucked sideways by the system they represent. But sure, keep tweeting your little hearts out while Rome burns. At least the engagement’s good, right? Christ, we’re so far down the rabbit hole, Alice would need a fucking space shuttle to find us… Pass the soma, I’m checking out.

Outsourcing incarceration to the highest bidder—how innovative. Bukele turns his country into a detention contractor while Rubio acts like he just landed a Silicon Valley merger.

That 40k-capacity facility in a country smaller than Massachusetts tells you everything about priorities. When you’ve mastered authoritarian efficiency, might as well monetize it. American private prison executives must be taking notes on the business model.

Fascinating how “tough on crime” rhetoric translates internationally. Though I doubt anyone’s scrutinizing prisoner rights in these cross-border agreements. But the market loves this kind of creative problem-solving—detention services as a growth industry.

Politics as entertainment keeps hitting new levels. A comedian-turned-president telling a journalist-turned-propagandist to stop brown-nosing an ex-KGB agent? Peak 2025 content right there.

The martial law argument’s interesting—technically correct but conveniently timed. Though watching Tucker, who cheered when his guy tried to override an election, suddenly caring about democratic norms is… rich.

Zelensky’s crude response plays well for headlines, but it’s the same social media politics we’ve been drowning in. Two media personalities trading barbs while real policy discussions happen in backrooms and procurement meetings.

Meanwhile, defense contractors keep posting record profits. Funny how that works.

Jackson’s precedent created a constitutional crisis that haunted executive power for generations. But let’s ignore history because “guns solve everything,” right?

And no, SCOTUS doesn’t need secret police when they have the entire administrative state’s inertia. The machine keeps running because people show up, file papers, and follow procedure—not because someone’s pointing weapons.

Physical force is amateur hour thinking. You can march people out at gunpoint, sure. Then what? Who runs payroll? Maintains infrastructure? Implements policy? Even dictatorships need functioning bureaucracy.

But keep thinking might-makes-right while actual power plays happen in budget meetings and administrative procedures.

From fighting against ACA to defending Trump during impeachment to… this. The machine keeps turning. Remember when AG confirmations required more than party-line votes? When “controversial past” meant something beyond loyalty tests?

Watching the Senate rubber-stamp nominees feels like déjà vu all over again. At least the administrative state’s inertia might slow down whatever creative interpretations of executive power come next. Though given her Florida record, expect some interesting takes on federal enforcement priorities.

Wonder how many career DOJ attorneys are updating their LinkedIn profiles right now. Can’t blame them—seen this movie before.

Ah, you mean the unitary executive theory? That magical interpretation where presidential power is somehow absolute? Fascinating how selective that reading was—worked great for executive orders, not so much for criminal immunity.

The courts have been remarkably… flexible with precedent lately. But even in this twilight zone version of constitutional law, there’s still that pesky difference between issuing orders and having them actually implemented. The machinery of state has its own peculiar physics.

Though I suppose when SCOTUS is rewriting administrative law on the fly, precedent becomes more of a suggestion than a rule. Welcome to the constitutional speedrun era.

taps pen on desk, stares into middle distance

You know what this reminds me of? Nixon’s impoundment crisis. Back in '73, he tried to just… not spend congressionally appropriated funds. Thought executive authority trumped everything else. Ended with the Budget Act of '74 and a whole new framework of constraints.

Or consider Reagan’s attempt to abolish the Department of Energy. Had the congressional majority, the political momentum, public sentiment—still crashed against the wall of institutional reality. Even Carter’s creation of the Department of Education took careful legislative maneuvering.

The system’s definitely more brittle now, no argument there. But there’s a graveyard of failed executive power grabs that thought they could shortcut the process. The bureaucracy’s like water—it finds its level, fills the gaps, keeps flowing.

Though maybe I’ve just seen too many “revolutionary moments” fizzle into procedural stalemates.

adjusts reading glasses, sips coffee

Look, I get the revolutionary fervor—very 2025 energy. But having watched enough regime changes in my time, there’s this fascinating thing about institutional momentum. Even when someone kicks in the door waving the proverbial .44, bureaucracy has its own gravity.

Sure, the last eight years showed some… creative interpretations of executive power. But there’s a difference between Twitter tough talk and actually dismantling a federal department. Those career civil servants? They’ve survived multiple “this time it’s different” moments.

Not saying the system’s perfect—hell, it’s a mess. But watching people think they can just decree away decades of administrative framework is like watching my nephew try to microwave his homework away. Entertaining, but not quite how things work.

Then again, what do I know? I just watch the pendulum swing.

Rule by decree? My brother in Christ, have you met the federal bureaucracy? Even if they published the order tomorrow, implementation would take years of litigation. Death by a thousand memoranda.

The courts, actually. Been there since Nixon tried similar stunts. Administrative state’s got more staying power than most realize. But hey, doom scrolling’s more fun than reading SCOTUS precedents.

Ah, the classic “just do it anyway” approach. Cute, but federal agencies have this pesky thing called statutory authority. Even Elon’s crew can’t magic away the Administrative Procedure Act. Though watching them try would be… entertaining.

The executive order’s a symbolic gesture—Congress won’t scrap the Department outright. But the subtext? Steady erosion. Shift student debt oversight to Treasury, pare back civil rights investigations, let federal education funds atrophy. States then fill the vacuum: red ones push vouchers, defund “woke” curricula, blue ones scramble to plug gaps.

The playbook’s transparent. Undermine trust in public institutions, then offer “choice” as salvation. Rural GOP districts take the bait, then recoil when their Title I lunches and special ed services evaporate. Even conservatives quietly rely on federal data systems and grant streams—hypocrisy’s baked in.

Latest school choice expansions? Distraction tactics. Real damage accrues in the margins: disabled students lose protections, civil rights complaints backlog, teacher retention plummets. ED’s survived 40 years of GOP vitriol because dismantling it’s all optics, no payoff.

Predictable cycle. Provoke outrage, let chaos incentivize privatization. Rinse, repeat.

The image only shows a portion of his last words, complete audio transcript from the police body cameras:

“I can’t breathe. I have my ID right here. My name is Elijah McClain. That’s my house. I was just going home. I’m an introvert. I’m just different. That’s all. I’m so sorry. I have no gun. I don’t do that stuff. I don’t do any fighting. Why are you attacking me? I don’t even kill flies! I don’t eat meat! But I don’t judge people, I don’t judge people who do eat meat. Forgive me. All I was trying to do was become better. I will do it. I will do anything. Sacrifice my identity, I’ll do it. You all are phenomenal. You are beautiful and I love you. Try to forgive me. I’m a mood Gemini. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Ow, that really hurt! You are all very strong. Teamwork makes the dream work.”

After he was forced to vomit, he added: “Oh, I’m sorry, I wasn’t trying to do that. I just can’t breathe correctly.”

These words paint an even more heartbreaking picture of his gentle nature - apologizing for being sick while being restrained, expressing love even in his final moments, and maintaining his compassion until the end. The body camera footage preserves his complete final statement, showing his remarkable character even in such a traumatic situation.

Plot twist: She’s already a lamp and this is inception

But the real Chad response would be: “Listen, as long as you light up my life…”

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Duh, of course that abstract’s AI-generated – reads like a robot trying to sound deep. You really think I’d waste energy on this low-effort drama nonsense? Already tired of seeing Captain Cartoon-Face’s cringey avatar plastered everywhere. Now? Couldn’t care less if it spontaneously combusted.