Look, sometimes I just want to spaff chocolate shards all over myself whilst I’m eating. And I don’t appreciate being judged for it.

Maybe I like having to lick my finger in order to dab up the mountain of shrapnel that remains in the wrapper. Have you considered that?

Perhaps I actually like eating a treat that sounds like it was named dangerously close to something related to dandruff…

The flake came first so the question should be what’s the point in the twirl when the flake exists

Flakes were “invented” by a worker picking the accumulated chocolate off the part of a machine where the conveyer belt ended and the chocolate got scraped off at the end.

Twix was invented by a Scottish granny who wrote a letter to Mars saying she melted Mars bars over her shortbread fingers and everyone loved them.

Twirls are superior though, unless you’re eating a flake in a bath and the crumb catastrophe can be ignored.

Because a 99 Twirl sounds ridiculous.

Firstly, Galaxy and Cadbury chocolate taste different, so a Ripple and a Twirl which are the same type of product are of different tastes, similar to a Cadbury Dairy Milk bar and a Galaxy bar.

But a flake is different, and not just a naked twirl. Different and increased crumbly texture as well as different type of chocolate, you supposedly can not melt a flake, unlike a twirl which you can.

And Flake always had the better adverts when I was a kid.

Ripple is in my opinion the top tier one although I only ever see it now in 4 packs and that means the pack is treated as one snack for me.

Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate tastes like chocolate never tasted before. That’s the point of a Flake.

But if you’re happy with chocolate that tastes secondhand then sure by all means have a Twirl.