Final Edit: I have decided to take a break from here for undecided time. I might come back when sure of myself. Limited activity at main instance.
Edit: I am replying, so please refer to them to get an idea of my worldview.
Context: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/650259 and these removed comments of mine, before Forte temp banned me
a screenshot of my comments
Before I start off, I want to tell that it is true that I am a cis het male human that holds monogamist views with the mildest of traditional takes. It is also true that despite never having had a real mother or a girlfriend in my life, I never became an incel. My mindset at the core is unapologetically survivalist, independent and masculine. I have also been chivalrous with women, and have been inclusive of the non binary communities. Some people will try to portray this as me never getting female love in life and all kinds of assumption based crap, which I can counter with years of selfless privacy community work.
I want to know what is so misogynistic about:
- a woman having multiple boyfriends and being a social player, which is very common today in the dating scene
- traditional views like monogamy instead of promiscuity are better
- social code being different for men and women
- women often dating for free food
- Western feminism not being a true representation of feminism, and how much it currently harms mainly men, and creating polarisation between both sexes
- psychology of dominance and submission in relationships factoring into the stability of any long term relationships, including marriage
Is it not deceitful to deny these patterns exist, and to just call someone misogynistic and shut down the conversation? Or have I misunderstood what Lemmygrad means for these kinds of conversations?
When did this place become so lib, that people were straight up told to “change your ways before you end up ruining a poor girl’s life”, or how “using ‘male’ and ‘female’ to refer to men and women as if they’re animals” is a terminology that radical feminists would otherwise get excused for? What are these assumed ideas I have that are so batshit crazy, compared to the kinds of values that hardcore masculinity gurus, Tate fans, incels/femcels hold? And what is the defined threshold expected for this place to accommodate people?
I hope I do not see a “404:site_ban” before I get to engage and get answers on this, and have a decent conversation. I am not threatening. I merely want a dialogue.
I know you don’t want to hear it, as others have approached it and you dismissed them, but brother you are already on the “too conservative” views. You don’t realise it any more.
The insidious thing about propaganda is that it doesn’t need to be true for someone to start believing it. It just needs to be repeated enough. Being exposed to their “centre-right” bullshit will slowly make you susceptible to it and justify it to yourself. See this story. That’s happened to you already, you’re repeating these ideas in the same mannerisms all the “redpill” people do and don’t even seem to see it.
I do gauge myself on the redpill/blackpill part of the spectrum. And I do need to investigate, but it is not easy. But I think it is worth it.
I will not pretend I just pretended everything I said here, because these are indeed my current beliefs. But I will admit I wanted this engagement in comments, to be able to hear the leftist side of things to learn more, since I have watched enough content from the centrist/conservative entities I mentioned. There is now something more for me to ponder over.
I have a question: why is there no guide or recommendations for these kind of topics, the way I make guides for digital privacy? I do have an answer for it in the form of social engagement being a circus, no matter which camp, but it may not be a sufficient answer. Also, anti-imperialism is a large focus of the communist struggle.
Since you head this instance, I do want to tell it is not that I was salty about the ban, but about being called a misogynist with no dialogue exchange. Although most people will not want to consider other POVs unlike me, or are merely outing themselves by mistake, so I think there needs to be a consideration not just for gauging to ban someone, but to have a dialogue. I created this dialogue, nobody wanted to have it with me. And all of you that are talking to me, are doing so because there is a shared trust considering my year long history here, and because some recognise my tech privacy work. I think gauging people needs a lot more work.
Ping @muad_dibber@lemmygrad.ml and other admins for the last paragraph
It’s just marxist feminism. There’s tons of different kinds of feminism, there’s no one authority on feminism, and we follow marxist feminism here. Lots of books to find and some have been recommended to you. You can read Zetkin, Kollontai, and even Engels’ Origins of the Family. Just as much as you can. And talk to women like you’ve done here and understand what they’re saying to you.
The first 5 day ban was given out exactly so you could read up on this and come back with a second chance. I’ll talk to the rest of the mod team and we might be inclined to try a third chance, but I can’t guarantee anything.
We are, and that’s why you received a temp ban the first time when we could have done a permanent ban. I think most of us are just confused that you, who has been with us for over a year and have otherwise made good contributions, would hold these views. If you can’t understand the confusion we’re feeling as a community then I’m not sure what can come out of any discussion.