Final Edit: I have decided to take a break from here for undecided time. I might come back when sure of myself. Limited activity at main instance.

Edit: I am replying, so please refer to them to get an idea of my worldview.

Context: https://lemmygrad.ml/post/650259 and these removed comments of mine, before Forte temp banned me

a screenshot of my comments

Before I start off, I want to tell that it is true that I am a cis het male human that holds monogamist views with the mildest of traditional takes. It is also true that despite never having had a real mother or a girlfriend in my life, I never became an incel. My mindset at the core is unapologetically survivalist, independent and masculine. I have also been chivalrous with women, and have been inclusive of the non binary communities. Some people will try to portray this as me never getting female love in life and all kinds of assumption based crap, which I can counter with years of selfless privacy community work.

I want to know what is so misogynistic about:

  • a woman having multiple boyfriends and being a social player, which is very common today in the dating scene
  • traditional views like monogamy instead of promiscuity are better
  • social code being different for men and women
  • women often dating for free food
  • Western feminism not being a true representation of feminism, and how much it currently harms mainly men, and creating polarisation between both sexes
  • psychology of dominance and submission in relationships factoring into the stability of any long term relationships, including marriage

Is it not deceitful to deny these patterns exist, and to just call someone misogynistic and shut down the conversation? Or have I misunderstood what Lemmygrad means for these kinds of conversations?

When did this place become so lib, that people were straight up told to “change your ways before you end up ruining a poor girl’s life”, or how “using ‘male’ and ‘female’ to refer to men and women as if they’re animals” is a terminology that radical feminists would otherwise get excused for? What are these assumed ideas I have that are so batshit crazy, compared to the kinds of values that hardcore masculinity gurus, Tate fans, incels/femcels hold? And what is the defined threshold expected for this place to accommodate people?

I hope I do not see a “404:site_ban” before I get to engage and get answers on this, and have a decent conversation. I am not threatening. I merely want a dialogue.

  • bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml
    1·
    2 years ago

    going on a date just to get free food under capitalism is wealth redistribution. a woman’s gotta eat and we make less money

    • bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml
      1·
      2 years ago

      don’t just downvote me, cowards, show yourselves. explain to me why feeding women is a bad thing without devolving into misogyny somehow. because I don’t see it.

      Commies are supposed to feed people, are we not?

      • Sleepless One@lemmygrad.ml
        1·
        2 years ago

        There’s no issue with going on a date just to get your food paid for, but your post makes it sound like its praxis, which is pretty silly.

        • bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml
          1·
          2 years ago

          it is silly to be sure, but is it wrong? or more silly than the original poster who expects something in exchange for buying a meal?

          besides that, not all praxis has to be big praxis. going on a date is an opportunity to make a genuine connection, and possibly to challenge false consciousness, and educate, agitate, and organize. this is something that potentially has value in itself. going on a date is in any case more praxis than eating a meal alone in front of a screen, which is the activity most of us of dating age would be doing instead.

          • Sleepless One@lemmygrad.ml
            1·
            2 years ago

            Fair enough. I thought from your comment you meant going on a date with someone you otherwise find repulsive (like a booj) and using the date just for food and not as a means of agitation.

            • bobs_guns@lemmygrad.ml
              1·
              2 years ago

              Let me clarify: Even using the date just for food is not a bad thing IMO. Socialism should not be poverty.

              Editing to add: I personally haven’t gone on a date just for a meal and I don’t know anyone who has. I think it is quite likely that OP has never gone on a date where the other person was just in it for the money. IMO he has quite a bit of “making someone up to be mad at” energy. All I’m saying is that if someone were to do that, it’s not something we should be focused on as a problem.