Feel like you want to sneer about something but you donāt quite have a snappy post in you? Go forth and be mid!
Any awful.systems sub may be subsneered in this subthread, techtakes or no.
If your sneer seems higher quality than you thought, feel free to cutānāpaste it into its own post, thereās no quota here and the bar really isnāt that high
The post Xitter web has spawned soo many āesotericā right wing freaks, but thereās no appropriate sneer-space for them. Iām talking redscare-ish, reality challenged āculture criticsā who write about everything but understand nothing. Iām talking about reply-guys who make the same 6 tweets about the same 3 subjects. Theyāre inescapable at this point, yet I donāt see them mocked (as much as they should be)
Like, there was one dude a while back who insisted that women couldnāt be surgeons because they didnāt believe in the moon or in stars? I think each and every one of these guys is uniquely fucked up and if I canāt escape them, I would love to sneer at them.
This is tangential, but thereās a surprisingly interesting article about penis enlargement from ProPublica. Itās sobering to see people whoāve convinced themselves it must have worked, because itās too horrible to consider whether they actually made things worse. If there are any crazy, invasive age therapies out there, maybe thereād be similar themes.
https://www.propublica.org/article/penis-enlargement-enhancement-procedures-implants
Jesus Christ, Iām a penis haver and reading this gives the same sensations as watching people be punched in the balls.
The amount of toxic masculinity brain rot required before you willingly go for such an invasive procedure is inconceivable to me.
Also, this fucking quote:
What in the fuckās mercy is this supposed to mean? Youāre supposed to change its battery every few years? Take it off at night? I have a watch, just, you know, not a Rolex, a normal-person fucking watch, and I canāt decipher this. Is there some specific species of brain worm you get when you buy specifically a Rolex watch?
Bonus
Perfectly placed in the article, youāre reading about a horrific predatory industry and then a Brit pops up saying āah those fookinā yankee wankers, mangling cocks and sending them to meā. Just all-round endearing.
Kinda brings a whole new meaning to āoverpaid, oversexed and over hereā
The writer says thereās some indication it may literally be a psychiatric condition along the lines of body dysmorphia, and that most people who go through with it are at least average sized but unhealthily preoccupied with their member, consistently reporting feelings of shame and helplessness.
She also says that supposedly the consensus on the evolution of genital size has been quietly moving away from assumptions about giving an edge with inseminatory success and towards them being just for show, as apparently male primates do tend to involve their genitals in threat displays. Which is to say, maybe for some people itās just unusual wiring that manifests as penis related existential angst.
Still, it doesnāt mention the extent to which the above is just evo-psych enthusiasts idly theorizing, or if field testing actually showed itās possible to win a showdown with a gorilla by dropping trou and windmilling.
And then thereās also the guy who had the procedure done and is super happy about it, except heās now looking at options for enlarging his wifeās vaginal canal and entrance as sheās been having a rough time of it, and who Iām sure would be found out to be the walking and talking personification of toxic masculinity if you were to give him the time of day.
Penis enlargement and breast implants can be understood as gender affirming surgery for cis people, it is just an affirmation of the gender assigned at birth. Rather than go to primates I would point to ancient Greece and itās statues to make the point that ideals of gender and bodies shift over time. Greek statues shows as I understand it often an ideal body, which by the norms of its time included a rather small penis. So maybe some male ancient Greeks wished there were treatments to shrink their package?
With gorillas, my understanding is that primates that have very unequal sizes between the sexes has small penises, while its among the primates with roughly equal body size you find larger penises. So akin to plummage, the males showing off of that their bodies can afford to waste resources, and thus presumably is very fit. I am no biologist, but I think this means that if you try to win a domination fight with a gorilla, it may show who is the boss by showing off its physical strength. So not recommended.
Iām now imagining populations of penis havers who scoff at the enlarged ones behaving like the Rolex aficionados who play āspot the fake Rolexā and get into all kinds of watch minutiae. Look at the telltale marks around the base - definitely enlarged, not like my 100% natural model, which comes 2.5 seconds fast per day.
You can see itās not genuine Penuma since its not leaking puss all over.
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@V0ldek @hrrrngh
Tie it to your wrist with a metal chain?
Show it to others as a visual gaudy signal of wealth?
Or to tell time? lifts left testicle ātenā lifts right āthirteenā.
Oh god theres a whole watch ācommunityā and its toxic as fuck.
āGuys will literally do anything instead of therapyā episode 2137
Tangential to your tangential - nice to see that the moral compass of McKinsey associates is still true north.
On a lighter note:
CW, if you are male, maybe skip the part where the actual implant procedure is described. Starting with the sentence āWith a purple marker,ā
@gerikson Eh, I grew up in a family of doctors. Theyād discuss their workdays at the dinner table. I fear nothing. Letās have a read, see what all the fuss is abā¦ (turns green, excuses self)
Someone on Masto thought that the industry had missed a chance to call the procedure āspatchcockingā.
Oh, thatās good.
working at an unspecified medical journal over an unspecified period of time
we occasionally had to remind ourselves about appropriate and inappropriate placeholder imagery
But then youāll never find out what like a jellyfish surfacing at sea is in reference to.
Iām not even halfway reading this and holy fuck itās grim
Yeah it is one of those, wish I had not read that stories. Poor guys.