• Danarchy@lemmy.nz
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    11 hours ago

    Every day I wake up and I let my watersub out of its fridgecage “have u been a good several trillion molecules while zaddy slept” i say “yes” they reply “yes what” I say “zaddy! Yes zaddy” but it is too late they have earned their corrective action so it’s out of the Brita and into the electric kettle for some steamplay “what happens to water molicussys that forget the rules?” I ask but they are already screaming with the boiling extacy of pain and pleasure knowing I have even bigger plans for them in the form of the glass and steel French press. Soon you will be hot and dirty just like you deserve, liquislut

  • viertesauge@feddit.org
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    15 hours ago

    I would never position myself under a glass of water, let alone raise my chin. I drink my water in the straightest way possible, from a long hard thick moist straw like a real man.

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      3 hours ago

      i also bob the straw in and out of my mouth the entire length of the straw, because I am eco-friendly and don’t want to waste my drink.

  • Rumo161@feddit.org
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    15 hours ago

    Im already horny all the time. How am i supposed to live my life if i sexualise even the things im bad at (like regulary drinking water i guess 😐)

  • Snot Flickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    15 hours ago

    that’s why after i take a drink i make sure sure to make that refreshed sound of the tonque click into “aaaaahhhh.”

    i make sure do it even more loudly at restaurants so everyone knows how tasty the water there is.