im so proud of you for this one, at least I know you’re not in deep enough that you repeat the “LG and Hexbear are all chinese bots!?!?” cliche.
Still it hurts, can’t you stroke our egos more like normal liberals do by pretending we’re important enough for China to pay attention to us like that 
wait, are we funded by the CPC or Russia? im confused, how am i gonna know what im supposed to post?!
It’s simple: the Russian and Chinese governments are actually one.
I mean, think about it: have you ever actually been to Russia and China? I mean, sure you’ve met people who claim to be “Chinese” or “Russian” online or maybe in the street, but they’re all getting paid by the government of the Sino-Soviet Socialist Republic, too. See, there was no Sino-Soviet split, actually, but rather a union — the whole split was actually a farce meant to trick the United States into believing that the socialist world was more fractured than it actually was. The USSR never actually dissolved, and there is no war in Ukraine, either — that’s just a way of tricking NATO into giving billions of dollars and countless firearms and so forth to the mighty SSSR.
The entire territory of the Soviet Union, the People’s Republic of China, the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, the Mongolian People’s Republic, the United Socialist Republic of Indochina, and the Democratic Republic of Afghanistan, are all one big glorious nation. This fact must never become known to the capitalist west! It is in fact the most masterful and ingenious part of the godless communist strategy to subjugate the entire globe under the mighty, terrible heel of the Dictatorship of the Proletariat!
So, yellow peril and red scare united into… orange terror?
Shit.
in a shocking turn of events, the service workers of florida have taken control of the national guard depots and established a people’s state. they have seized all private industry and are engaged in a defensive war against the US military. they call it “orange terror”
FBI cannot confirm whether they meant the U.S. state of Georgia’s southern neighbor or the sovereign one’s southern neighbor in an embarrassing turn of events
“in a bout of confusion, the US has invaded Armenia”
Fortunately for everyone, since Armenia is part of the communist superstate (as the Soviet Union), the U.S. accidentally sent in tankies instead of tanks in a second communication error.
Your last paragraph made me both happy and sad. Don’t cry for what could have been, smile for what was…
In fact, BRICS actually serves as a front to make people think there are independent countries, and for secret annexation votes to the communist superstate.
There was actually a secret vote in 1991 to annex other countries into this superstate, so the dissolution of the USSR was performed as a masterful distraction by Comrade Gorbachev
And that’s why to this very day, faking the dissolution of a country while actually expanding it is referred to in communist circles as “gorbing it down Soviet style”
This geopolitical football is often accompanied by stuffed crust cheese bread with tomato sauce
Yim yum!
checkmate tankie
The CPC is doing most of the funding, but Russia agreed to contribute bot technology to CPC if we would support Russia despite being a capitalist state. This scheme worked quite well, and Lemmygrad today is full of pro-Russian commenters.
thanks for explaining comrade! sometimes you have to make compromises for the movement: the USSR allied with britain and amerika to defeat fascism. its simpler on hexbear, we’re funded by george soros, so we just have to be massive liberals
Internal CPC rumors suggest funders of both Lemmygrad and Hexbear can be found shitposting on Hexbear. This seems to include @XiJinping@hexbear.net and @SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net (obviously George Soros himself) at minimum.